The Prison of Pretending

The Truth You Were Never Supposed to Remember. We’re taught that humility means surrendering our power — to God, to systems, to fear. But what if the truth is simpler: you were never not in charge.

The real Truth of every situation is that you are in your own world. Whatever you see is created from just this little imagination that you are. How it’s so hard to notice this is another issue — actually that’s what everyone wants to know, even if they don’t know it.

Mainly this stems from wanting a wonderful life full of all the things you want to have while doing the things you want to do. You want to know what control — if any — you have over this imaginative dreaming aspect. It’s easier to say it like this: you want to be the sole owner of your life, because deep down you know you are — but you’re pretending not to be.

You’re either free or you’re a slave, but you can’t be both. If you can’t decide to do whatever you want right now, then you’re the latter. Choice is everything. If you’re forced into playing the game of life, then you’re not a player. Only those who can choose whether to play or not can actually play. Everything else is called work. And while there’s nothing wrong with work per se — if that’s what you’re choosing to do — if you’re not choosing it, then you are boxed in. That’s called being in a prison of your own making.

There’s been talk about this sort of thing for as long as anyone can remember. Everyone’s trying to explain how life works, but most of it just makes people more confused. So they pretend to understand, as if acting certain somehow makes them free. It doesn’t. It just means they’re still trapped in their own imagination, suffering from the distance between what they are and what they’re pretending to be.

The illusion is convincing — everyone’s fooled by it. And the moment you try to step outside it, the chorus begins: you’re asking for too much, you’re ungrateful, you should just accept things as they are. We’re taught that wanting to own our lives is arrogance — that surrendering to something outside ourselves is virtue. Be humble, be patient, be nice, follow the rules, keep your head down. God’s busy, they say, but maybe if you’re good enough, you’ll move up His list. Until then, work hard, be grateful, don’t question anything.

That’s the training.
That’s the trap.

The dream taught you to forget what was dreaming.

The Mechanics of Manifesting

“You create your own reality.” Who hasn’t heard this line? Manifestation is sold as a skill you can master — but you’re never told how it actually works. It’s the carrot at the edge of the rabbit hole, designed to keep you circling around it but never falling in. Every disappointment at not being able to manifest keeps you from ever doing it. You think you’re digging your way out, but you’re really burying yourself alive.

To truly change your mind — which means changing the fundamental ways you create and perceive reality — is an entirely different trip. You can’t get anyone to take it with you. All your friends and family exist to hold you in place, how and where they like you. They have their own prison-built versions of reality, and breaking out of yours will always threaten theirs.

To question your own reality is to question all reality — including the reality of other people. And they won’t like that. Every personality relies on the reflection you allow them to mirror. If someone’s hallucinated world makes them important, and you treat them as if nothing they say means anything, it won’t go over well.

Let me just say this now — and I truly mean it — nothing means shit. That includes this writing. The only things that mean anything are those you choose to give meaning to. You can do whatever you want with that — believe, reject, ignore — it’s your prerogative.

If I’m threatened by what you believe, it only means I’m afraid you’re right and I’m wrong. But no one’s going to be right about anything. Being right is always just opinion — personal or collective — never Truth. Anyone who needs you to agree with them doesn’t know what they’re talking about. Convincing is what people do when a belief feels shaky — they gather others around it to hold it up.

The role of others is to uphold the illusion, not tear it down. If you haven’t gone out on a limb where no one goes with you, you’re still unsure. Once you know what’s going on, no one else can confirm anything for you — and you wouldn’t want them to. Everything that serves the illusion will be encouraged; everything that threatens it will be suppressed. That’s how it works. And that’s the part you have to see for yourself.

We call it life, but mostly it’s machinery.
The routines, the rules, the endless cause-and-effect we worship — all of it running on the same invisible gears.
You think you’re steering, but you’re being steered.
The mind is the machine, and the moment you see that, the game changes.

The End Of Fear

Fear was the first god we ever served.
Every thought, every choice, every rule — built around avoiding its fire.
But when you finally stop running, you find out it was never chasing you.
It was only waiting to burn away what you’re not.

When it comes to manifesting, your beliefs always get in the way — even this one: “I need to manifest.” Needing is another name for fear. It means you don’t know what you are. If you think you need something, it can’t appear — because you’ve already declared it missing. Thinking won’t help. Manifestation is not a thought; it’s a knowing. It’s a calm awareness that everything is already here in potential. You realize it, or you don’t. To change who you are, you first have to see you were never that. Then you might become the what you are, instead of the who. But how can you live as no one? You still need a body to have a cup of coffee, right? We are shaped by tension and reaction. As children, we learned to sense danger — it was passed on. Every “no” carried threat. The nervous system memorized fear. Those patterns became our identity. We call them personality, but they’re just inherited reflexes. Undoing this takes time, because what you’re really doing is learning to meet life without flinching. Life will still throw things at you — sometimes hard things, sometimes meaningless ones — but none of them are tests. They’re just echoes of the pattern, impartial and impersonal. When the pattern ends, suffering ends. You have to know — not believe, but know — that nothing can truly happen to you. This awareness won’t place you anywhere you don’t need to be. To know this for yourself is to stop resisting what’s happening. Trust becomes your navigation tool. Once you’ve seen again and again that this invisible intelligence can be trusted, you eventually do it automatically — and you’ll wonder why you ever doubted. But until then, your mind and body will fight it, because they’re still on the side of fear. The years of inner work are only chipping away at that. Comfort is the enemy. Ego will always take the off-ramp if you give it one. You have to intend to rid yourself of fear every single day — not as a hobby, but as a mission. This isn’t about feeling good. It’s about going into the heart of the darkness and watching it dissolve. You’ll know when it’s happening: things will fall apart, emotions will surface, the pattern will scream. Let it. Don’t interfere. When the day comes that fear finally releases its last strand, it’s a new life. The eyes that see it aren’t the same eyes. Then you know. You don’t need anyone to tell you anything again — except maybe what time the flight leaves. You no longer need to escape your life, because you are that life, and nothing can take it from you. Everything was imagination, but now you can imagine again — consciously. This time, as the creator, not the captive. In a world where you have to be insane to choose the Truth, choose insanity. You’ll be alone, but that’s how it has to be. “Normal” is just a dull form of sleepwalking. Reach beyond it. Let the unseen become the seen. That’s the journey. No one said it had to be pretty — only that it had to be true.